A fascinating meme, started by The Most Honorable Frog.)
My room in hell would be painted the same Pepto-Bismol pink as my ill-fated childhood bedroom. The paint would be peeling, the walls would be dirty and yellowing. There would be tons of clutter everywhere and I'd never be able to find anything. The bed would be single, hard and extra-short, and only have one very thin pillow. The sheets would be very low thread-count percale, and they would be stained. The bed would never be made. All of the blankets would be scratchy wool.
The floor of my room in hell would be covered in wool carpet, so my feet would constantly itch or I'd have to wear shoes. I'd have no closet space and no shelves or drawers to put things in. There would be uncovered windows to look in on me in the night, with extra-bright street lights just outside and loud, abusive neighbors.
The dust would be inches thick over everything in my room in hell. There would be no vacuum for the rug, dust clothes, or any way to get rid of the clutter. There would be a musty smell, as if somewhere something is molding.
There would be a small black and white TV with lousy reception playing "Days of Our Lives" over and over again, with extra-long breaks for that super irritating "Mama's got the magic" Clorox commercial. The stereo would only be able to play contemporary country and Michael Bolton.
All food in my room in hell would incorporate slimy mussels and boiled spinach. Nothing would have any salt. There would be no Pepsi. It would have the world's slowest dial-up connection.