As an excercise in making myself feel like shit, I just calculed my net worth (you can do it here: http://www.kiplinger.com/personalfinance/tools/networth.html). It's negative. Medium high negative. About six months' salary negative.
Which I guess is probably not too unusual, for someone my age, but it's still depressing. I'm young, ambitious, well-educated, have never been unemployed for very long, and still debt-riddled and living paycheck to paycheck. Which makes me feel, to put it simply, like a big fat failure.
It also makes me think of crazy get-out-of-debt quick schemes, which is a really bad idea.
Why are we trained, as Americans, or Westerners, or people, to equate our value as human beings with our monetary value? What good does that do us? In particular, what good does it do women, who tend to be behind the financial eight-ball more often than men, or those of us who had the misforune of growing up poor enough that we came out college with two years' salary worth of loans? Who does it benefit for us to be so trained to calculate our worth by our paychecks and assets?
And, alternatively, why didn't I realize earlier that all of this money stuff was going to be so damn important? For a long time, I thought that even if I had realized it, I would have made the same choices anyway. But that's just not true. I would have gone to college somewhere cheaper. I would have considered possible career fields based on their ability to support me as well as their ability to entertain me. I would have held off on home buying. And boy would I have shopped less.
I know I'm lucky, having this come-to-Jesus moment now, at 26, rather than much later. I still have time to get my financial ducks in a row while I'm able-bodied and healthy and can work. But damn I wish I'd started earlier.
Comments (5)
Not to be a smart ass, but do you go back through past posts/ threads? It's like clockwork. I have debt as well, but I am not too concerned. Are you saving at all? That's what really matters, IMO. I put $118 a week in my 401k. I have 2 roth's- maybe 15k combined. The only thing I need to do in order to stay on track with my plan to retire at 55 is to start putting 4k a year in my roth. That will give me the cash between 55 and 59, which is the age that I can start collecting my retirement that I am saving now. I don't stress over the fact that I pay close to $500 a month towards debt because I am saving at the same time. My house will be paid off in 19 years, so that won't be an issue when I stop working. It just seems to me that this consumes you and that you are forever chasing the magical solution. The advice, debt, and income won't change-- you need to start listening to it.
Posted by marah | May 19, 2006 10:22 AM
I know it's a pattern. I've said as much. I know I have a problem. I'm trying to get it solved. And I think, now, I have a handle on it, or am at least getting a handle on it. My post was bemoaning not having a handle on it earlier. Which was pretty clear. But hey, if being condescening to me makes you feel better, have at it.
Posted by Grace | May 19, 2006 10:40 AM
i would point out that some of your debt is GOOD debt, ie your house. I don't think you should feel bad about that. Generally, I don't think it's a problem that people beat themselves up about going into debt. In fact I generally think they don't think hard enough before going into debt. Obviously I am not talking basic education funding and house funding. It's become really accepted (at least among every group of people I have lived amongst, all highly educated people, mostly humanities types) to go highly into debt without much of a worry. Sure, you can get loans to go to college, but you can also choose to go to cheaper colleges, Mr. Five Humanities Masters Degrees. I can't feel bad for people who take out 40K to get English Masters degrees from third tier yet expensive schools with no plan to pay it back. I think everything in our society right now is built for people to easily go into debt, but there's a real lack of people realizing this. "Oh I want that couch and I can get a loan so I'll buy it." That doesn't mean it's in your best interest to do so. The idea behind this is that because people want something (no matter how impractical or expensive) they should get it sort of astounds me. I don't think this is always people's fault, I think a LOT of it is built into this ability to get credit so easily now, but sheesh, we as consumers have to wise up a bit too. The first loans *I* took out were that way--I now think I was totally unqualified to make those decisions, but people who profit off of uneducated consumers aren't just going to stop, you know? This is not a diatribe against you, I am making sure to point out, but rather the annoying credit exploitation I see around me. Had to vent, sorry!
Posted by triumphantly, jenny | May 19, 2006 11:48 AM
Uh...I think it might make you feel better, Grace, if you were to chart, over time, your increasing earning power. Don't you earn more now than you did three years ago? And, if anything, think of a reasonable amount of debt as systemic prod to keep you running towards work on the days when you would rather not. Uh...yeah. Maybe you should get a reputable accountant/financial advisor? I know they cost money, but in the long run, it may pay off.
Posted by simonmaxhill | May 19, 2006 12:41 PM
also, i am using morale-o-meter: http://morale.erikbenson.com/ to track things. many data points will give me info if there are recurring changes. i think it's interesting.
Posted by triumphantly, jenny | May 19, 2006 4:53 PM