What if No One's Watching?

So I've told you before about my love-hate relationship with Lush. But really, I gotta say, I'm just about over them now.

What happened is this: Mark's brother and his partner generously sent me a box of stuff from Lush for Christmas. Unfortunately, they picked all skincare products, which are wasted on me, the girl who does not wash her face. So, I called Lush to see if I could exchange the products, all of which are still encased in their plastic wrapping. And the fairly short person with whom I spoke told me I could probably return them to a store. When I told her I did not have a local store, she told me that the person who ordered the items could return them, because they needed "proof" that they were purchased. When I said I had the packing slip, she said that wasn't good enough and I couldn't return them. Keep in mind, please, that I wasn't trying to return these items for cash--I just wanted to exchange them for bath stuff.

OK. So I went over to the Lush website, where there is a forum where I'd previously seen people swapping Lush products. After foraging through threads and FAQs to try to find out how to swap, I finally posted a question re: swapping. And was told swapping isn't allowed there anymore.

So. I have over $50 worth of fancy face wash and moisturizer, which I will not use, which Lush will not exchange formally or informally. I emailed them to complain, but so far all I've received is a stock "we received your message, here is our FAQ" reply.

These products cost way too much for this level of customer service to be acceptable. If I hadn't been done with Lush before, I would be now.