What if No One's Watching?

In her comment on my last clothing-related post, in which I mentioned that my outfits are cause for scorn elsewhere, Sam said the following:

Something I really appreciate about your blog is how you so honestly put yourself out there.

Thanks, Sam. That's a huge compliment, because to me, that's the heart of it. I made a deal with myself a long time ago that if I was going to put myself out on the internet, I was going to do it honestly. No pseudonym, no alternate online personality, and no attempt to hide my many flaws or the things I am constantly working on about myself. If it's worth doing, it's worth doing with my actual self.

Though that outlook has led to some discomfort for me in the past, most recently when my actual clothes, which I actually wear every day, were ridiculed roundly by people with whom I have no relationship, it's not something I regret or want to change. My list of things that I owe myself and the world around me includes honesty, and it includes constant striving for improvement. It doesn't include making anybody comfortable.

And so, I am going to continue this project, as honestly as I can. It's an effort both to show myself, as I really appear, to my readers (and to the future me who I envision coming back to read these entries) and to work towards a goal--in this case, better clothes. Today, I put my face in the picture, just to underscore my commitment to doing this honestly, even if it earns me ridicule. What you see in the picture is how I really look today. It's that simple. I haven't brushed my hair, I don't shave my armpits, and yeah, I have a big, big butt. If me being honest here is too uncomfortable for you, the internet always gives you the option to look away. That's fine. What isn't fine, anymore than it is in the "real world," is to take what I put out here somewhere else, somewhere where I presumably cannot respond or even read, and use me as the butt of immature jokes. We're all better than that.