Measure twice

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Let me just warn you at the outset: this is going to be a post about my boobs.

Now then.

I have long complained, often and loudly, about bras. They cut, they dig in, they aren't comfortable, and my GOD how can you wear one with a wire? It was beyond me. And I always end the rant with a little thankful prayer that my chest is small enough not to have to wear a bra every day, or ever wear one with a wire. The wonder of being flat-chested.

The last time I went down this particular path, someone stopped me. "But," she said, "you're not flat-chested! I've seen you!"

"I am," I assured her. "I wear a 36B. And I'm a big girl. That's pretty flat on this body."

And even though she was online, I could hear her laughing. "I think," she said, "that you should get measured."

I was indignant. I've BEEN measured. I headed the grrl-power advice years ago, going to a department store with a big group of friends and all getting measured. That's how I knew I was a 36B.

And already I suspect you know the punchline. "Years ago?" she asked. "How many years? Which years? Your breasts can grow well up into your twenties."

How many years, indeed. Nearly six, as it turns out. And those formative, 24-30 ones. With at least a ten pound weight gain each year. So I tromped out and had my chest measured.

I'm sure it surprises nobody who has read this far that I was wearing the wrong size bra. Wrong band size, wrong cup size. And when I started trying on bras in the correct size, they did, magically, seem to become far less irritating garments.

The really weird part, though, is not how someone so relatively intelligent could not think of the fact that her size might change over time (just like her sizes in everything else, including shoes, have). The weird part is how I feel differently about myself. I have the exact same boobs I did when I was wearing smaller bras, but they feel heavier now, fuller, bigger. They don't feel like a flat chest. They feel like substantial, adult boobs.

I'm 30 and I think I just finished puberty.

8 Comments

Oh, Bubchen, has anyone told you about Aunt Flo? Some day soon, you will be a woman...

Hand to God, that's how my mother referred to it, and of course, when it happened, she let everyone know.

Dude. I had the same experience. I was a 36C and then gained lots of weight over the years. I just got a larger band size. Finally, I got measured in my mid-30s and found out I'm a DD! No wonder I hated bras so.

And, I also experienced feeling differently about my boobs after hearing they were DD. I think I pointed it out to Mark like a dozen times...like they were new boobs or something. :)

Congrats on getting sized! :) May you enjoy shopping for bras now that they're not torture traps anymore.

I have always wondered what the point of non-wire bras are. Seriously if I am sitting up or standing for more than 15 mins, it's torture without a bra.

Welcome to the comfy bra club!

Sigh. I'm 31 and I think I still wear an A cup. When you get down into those sizes, you don't have any choices other than a) the exact same bra your mom bought you when you were in the 6th grade, b) something scary, with cantilevers and padding and a flying buttress, or c) a sports bra. Target makes lots of cute ones.

@ganymede, I feel your pain. I avoid sales folks because they try to sell me underwire bras. TO HOLD UP WHAT EXACTLY?

The only thing more torturous than ill-fitting bras is SHOPPING for bras. After moderate weight loss (10-15 pounds), it took me 18 months to find anything other than nursing bras that fit without gapping, spilling out, cutting in, etc. And no, the weight loss had nothing to do with babies. I then dropped $150+ on TWO bras which were the most comfortable things ever, and which I wore until they wore out.

Getting fitted at an upscale lingerie shop is totally worth it. And Victoria's Secret bras work for very few ladies. Those are my stories about bras.

I am happy that it finally occurred to you to get refitted. I basically have to every time because they change a just enough all the time. Its SOOOO hard to find a bra for me because I have "huge tracks o land" (monty python anyone?) I am a 36 DDDD no kidding. Thankfully they balance out my hips, lol you can imagine my hips. But if I go with out a bra for more than say 20 min, my back ACHES! They are heavy so my straps totally cut into my shoulders. For this reason I would totally try a corset. I figure it would make me sit up strait and sit too much and my shoulders would feel better. lol Wear a corset under a t-shirt and mini skirt, that would be funny!

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